So let's take a little detour back to 2009, when my friends John and Rachael got married. I had learned a great trick, which was taking redeyes back to Chicago so I wouldn't have to miss any work. The plan was that I'd sleep on the plane, Nick would get me, we'd drive to Indiapolis for the 10 am wedding, so we'd probably leave by 8 pm at the latest.
The reality was sliiiightly different.
After working a full day, I went home, showered, then grabbed my stuff and took a shuttle to LAX, where I took an overnight flight to Chicago. Unfortunately, this was when I apparently stopped being able to sleep on planes, so what I did get was sporadic. I landed around 5:30 am at O'Hare, where Nick picked me up. We had time to get breakfast and to change at his apartment, and then started on the road trip to Indianapolis. It's a three-hour drive, and to be honest one of the most boring drives I've been on. Most of the time in the Midwest, you'll at least get corn and farms and billboards for local stuff. You only get that so far on this drive, and then you get nothing. It's all fireworks billboards and cows, and then nothing. I had a purse full of Five Hour Energy and I was taking full advantage of that. After all, you can take two in a 24 hour period, right? That's plenty of time.
We got in before 10, and the wedding was low-key but awesome, and it was a great chance to hang out with friends I hadn't seen in like six years. We had so much fun, in fact, that we didn't leave until TWO IN THE GOD DAMN MORNING.
The good thing is that parts of Indiana don't care about things like DST, so we got an hour back. But by that time I'd had ten hours' worth of Five Hour Energy, couldn't take anymore especially if I wanted to sleep at all, but I was too wired to sleep in the car. And thank god Nick was driving because I really did start hallucinating from tired. It was pitch black and rained occasionally, and I could swear I'd see things in the road and freak out while Nick was left going "Just go to sleep already." I was probably not helpful.
We got back to Chicago at about 4:30, and I had an 8:00 flight, meaning I was able to get an hour's worth of sleep before I had to get back to the airport, which was the worst thing I could have done. I do it to myself a lot, too. Personally, if I can only get an hour, I might as well just stay up because otherwise I can't shake off the exhaustion. Nick dropped me off at the airport on one hour of sleep in 36 hours... and United screwed up my flight. They overbooked several seats, and refused to leave until they got people to go on standby, which worked for me since I was literally the last person on the plane, freaking out that they'd leave me behind when I was so tired. But I made it, and I got in the seat, put my belt on, and immediately passed out until we landed.
And you know what, I consider it all an accomplishment. An accomplishment that I will never freaking do again.
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